A few days after I came out as trans, I was summoned to see Rev Fred*, who was my parish priest when I lived in Milton Keynes and whose church I attended at that time. We were going to meet in the local pub for a pint, but at the last minute, he asked if we could meet in the vicarage garden instead.
After several minutes of small talk, he told me he was deeply worried about my intention to transition. He put my gender dysphoria down to being a sexual abuse survivor, although I had known I was trans (though I didn't have the language to express it in those terms) for over a decade before I met my abusive ex-partner. Rev Fred* proceeded to warn me that I was going against God's plan for me, and would be mutilating my body if I ever had surgery or took hormones.
This all ended with him reading Psalm 139, which Rev Fred* clearly intended to make me believe that God had made me female and I was seeking to go against this. He then prayed that I would be healed from the effects of the abuse and no longer be queer in any way (which he made clear also meant ending my relationship with the woman is who was then my fiancé and is now my wife). After this, I went home.
That meeting with Rev Fred* convinced me to leave that church, and move to Cornerstone, where I had already gone to some of the evening services. I was lucky; I found a supportive minister there, and I was secure enough in myself that Rev Fred* and his attempt at exactly the kind of prayer the Evangelical Alliance insist must not be outlawed didn't do too much damage. However, I shudder to think what might have happened if I had been in a more vulnerable place, or had not had somewhere safe to go instead.
Religious organisations and ministers/pastors must NOT be exempt from any ban on trying to change someone's gender identity and/or sexual orientation. It causes huge damage, and calling it 'pastoral prayer' or 'exploratory prayer' does not change that fact.
* Not his real name.
